Updated: Mar 25
Single, Fabulous & Fostering Series
Yesterday I had a good conversation with my social worker - she called to check in to see where I was at in terms of fostering, what my needs are and to let her know when I was ready to get another child.
I have to tell you, my "nesting instinct" started to come out and my heart began to flush with a warming sensation as I thought about the prospect of adding another child into my life.
After we hung up, I took a few moments to pause and to identify what sort of emotions that I was feeling.
Geeze, if I can take in all the kids in the world that need a safe and loving adults in their lives, if I had the capacity, I would.
She shared the increase of kids going into the "system" and the greater need for Foster parents.
Going back to "nesting" .......
This message is to those who do not have children "You do not need to be pregnant with child to experience "nesting". I know that from experience.
Although, at the moment, I am not prepared to take another child in, I began to think of ways of how I can expand my current living situation.
"I need a three bedroom" I told myself, after being content for so long with my two bedroom home.
You see, even though my Foster Son aka "the kid" has reunified with his mom, he is still a very big part of my life and I with his.
When he comes over my house to spend a night or two, I tell him that this is still a place he can call "home". I have turned his bedroom into my work from home office, but he still has stuff like his favorite blanket on the bed. His mother has also created a loving space for him at their house as well.
This weekend, it made my heart happy when I realized that he felt comfortable without 2nd guessing himself to say "When we get home" and not "when we get to your house."
We have conversations about bringing in another kid into "our home", just like someone who has children would talk about "mom having another baby".
My "nesting" is preparing the child already in my life to open his heart and mind to having an addition to our family.
I also began to think of ways to create space in my current home or do I need to save some money to increase my living space to welcome more children in?
That is "nesting" preparing your home for an arrival of a child. Whether that child is biologically yours our not, we "nest" and think of the child's future as we prepare our homes, our lives for their homecoming.
My eyes did swell and I fought the tears. "I got to focus on emails right now .." I told myself, not wanting to get emotional. But, as I went to bed last night and woke up this morning, that feeling in my heart is still there and is getting stronger.
I realize that I need to do some more "nesting" to prepare my home space, get emotionally ready among other things before I accept another. I know deep down inside the "nesting" period has once more begun and I look forward to the future.
There are so many different opportunities when you foster; so far, I have taken in children who need a short-term foster home. When I first set out to do this, I was adoption minded only. But gosh, if I would have kept that mindset, I would have missed out of the 2 individuals who have changed my life that I welcomed into my home.
Now, I am considering short term foster care as something permanent - I don't know .... only the future will tell.
I encourage you to view this video. If you are thinking about becoming a foster parent, but nervous about long-term care, you might want to try it out first, I hope this video encourages you to consider that as an option while you get more comfortable with idea.
Whether it be emergency, short-term, long-term or adoption foster care, you make a difference in the life of a kid who needs to be loved unconditionally.
It's no walk in the park, but is parenting in general a walk in the park? With any kid?
If you have thoughts about foster parenting and would like to ask me questions, you are more than welcome to email me at: firstname.lastname@example.org.
If the children are our future, then our future needs you.