Updated: Mar 25
~Baffling Questions That This Single 40somethig Free Spirited Women Never Had To Answer or Questions She Never Knew Existed ~ By: Jenny Chamberlain
I wrote this blog when I first became a single foster parent, I had just finished meeting a potential foster child and not having experience in this department, I really didn't know what to expect.
I smile as I read what I previously wrote, because I have grown so much since then and absolutely love the "Single, Fabulous & Fostering" life!
I just finished meeting my potential foster son. He is up for adoption, so I know how important this meeting is to the both of us. I had no idea of what to expect or what matters to 11 year boys these days.
Thought I'd share my experience for those of you who are considering becoming a parent for the first time through foster care.
It was quite the humorous learning experience and I look forward to what tomorrow brings.
Boy Question 1: When will be my bedtime?
Me: Ummmm.. hmmmm.... errrr.. good question! (Big gulp with a bewildered look on my face) What time you normally go to bed?
Boy Answer: 10-10:30pm is a good time for me!
(Thinking in my head "Oh, good! I'm such a night bird.. that works)
Social Worker Intervention Answer: "That's kind of late.. maybe a good idea for weekends. 9pm is a good time for school nights"
Me and Boy Answer: "Oh ya, that seems about right.."
Boy Question 2: What time is breakfast?
Me: Oh.....hmmm, good question! What time do you go to school? What time do you normally eat breakfast?
(The truth is, I really don't know that answer because I just roll out of bed, and run out of the house and grab something to eat on my way out)
Boy Answer: 6-7am is a good time for breakfast!
Me: "Okay, we can make that work!
Inside, I am thinking "Yikes! That's pretty early for breakfast! Guess I gotta gear up to make it happen! This kid seems like he really enjoys his breakfast time!)
Boy Question 3: "Can we have a dog?"
Me: "Oh, ummm.. hmmm (head scratch) well, my place is kind of small...
(Boy looks at me with a smile, dang! It's gonna be hard to say no to this kid).
I continue to say: "Maybe we can take small steps. I have a cousin who works for Canine Companions we can go visit the dogs there... maybe we can start off with a fish?"
Conclusion: We negotiated down to some sort of lizard, he's got some great negotiating skills, but I have been negotiating a lot longer than him... I still think I might have some leverage left in me to get a fish... but then again, he just might smile and we might end up with an iguana or something... lol
Boy Question 4: "What type of food would you make for me?"
Note: This was a question that pondered through mind all day because... drum roll please... I'm really not a cook! I don't need to cook every day, when I do cook, I don't cook for anyone else but myself or once in a while for friends. Do I even know how to really cook? (Yes, I am cracking up while I type this).
I'm a single, free Spirited woman, have been for years!
In my head I'm thinking: Well, I eat out a lot...Lol.. guess it's time to do some growing up... I'm ready for it. 🤣🤣😂
Me: Well, I have a special diet because I am gluten free and have food allergies. I don't expect you to do the same, so we will go shopping and you can tell me types of food you like and we can take it from there! (I.e. we can figure out together how to do this and I will be downloading some recipes from the internet - do you like macaroni and cheese?)
Boy Question 5: Do you have good wifi?
Me: Yes, in fact the main connection is your room. That's an unique question to ask (I smile at him wondering why he asked that...)
Boy answers in excitement: That is a good place to play video games! My favorite is Fortnite!
(Me, more confused than ever... what is Fortnite and why is he so happy that the main wifi connection will be in his room?
Me: Well, I don't know too much about video games, but that is something you can teach me about ....(I say smiling..)
(Me, wow this whole video game world is huge! It's like taking college courses to learn this stuff... but I am related to some trusty experts... you know who you are... Lol)